Intuition in Relationships

In the dance of our relationships, there is a subtle but powerful force that exists – our intuition. In our day-to-day life, Intuition is often overshadowed by logic and reason. But when understood and used to our benefit, intuition can serve as an inner compass, offering guidance and clarity in our relationships.


What is intuition

Although intuition can be difficult to define, I like to describe it as a guiding light illuminating the path to our authentic self. And the cornerstone of any healthy relationship is authenticity.  It is a knowing we have within that we can’t always explain – but somehow just feel. It resonates in our heart – or gut – or even our soul. It’s often a subtle sensation, like a whisper. 


Ryuu Shinohara, in her book “The Magic of Manifesting”, describes intuition as a communication that,

“doesn’t occur through our thoughts, rather it occurs through our emotions – our gut instinct, that nudge in our heart, that spidey sense we feel instinctually”.


Intuition has kept humankind alive throughout history, saving us from predators and nudging us toward a path to safety. It often goes deeper than our thoughts. Sometimes, it may even contradict our thoughts. For example, our thoughts might tell us that “nothing is wrong”, but our gut tells us something’s off – it’s just a sense we have about a situation. Our thoughts might take a while to catch up with our gut knowing. 


It’s important to remember that the wisdom of one’s intuition is unique to each person. It shines a light on what’s right for each of us. What is right for one person, might not be right or best for another. 


How intuition helps us in relationships

The more we can tune into our intuition, the more authentic we become, as our intuition guides us towards what is true for us. And the more authentic we become, the more our relationships are positively impacted. 


Our intuition can reveal if a situation or relationship is good and right for us. It also indicates if something is wrong, off, or not best for us. Healthy relationships are based on trust, respect, and authenticity, and our intuition shows us how to cultivate these aspects of our relationships. 


Our intuition tells us the truth. It shows us… 

  • when our boundaries are being crossed
  • when we might be encroaching upon someone else’s boundaries
  • what we want and need in our relationships
  • when to speak our truth, or when to stay silent 
  • what we feel – anger – sadness – loneliness – frustration – etc
  • ways we can grow in our relationships
  • when to let something go
  • whether to stay in a relationship or leave


Another beautiful aspect of our intuition is that it can guide us to see the “other” more deeply. It allows us to perceive subtle nuances in emotions and even unspoken communication, which can help us cultivate sensitivity to the feelings and needs of others. This supports our relationships, especially when someone has difficulty articulating their feelings or thoughts in a given situation. 


How to practice embodying our intuition

  • Practice LISTENING to yourself. Some practices for doing this include free-flowing/unfiltered journaling, meditation, and walks in nature where you simply listen. What is your intuition telling you? What are the whispers you hear?


  • Practice TRUSTING yourself. When you have that sense of knowing within yourself, trust it. Have friends or other systems of support walk beside you. They can affirm and mirror back to you what your gut is telling you. This can be especially helpful if you find yourself new to the practice of trusting yourself. 


  • Practice TAKING ACTION on the intuitive nudges you receive. It might be little things, such as whether to read or watch a TV show (and what’s best for you in any given moment), or something more significant such as having a difficult conversation or leaving a job you’ve had for years. Action is how we align ourselves with our intuition.


  • Practice PAYING ATTENTION to what your intuition whispers to you about your relationships. Are you feeling the nudge to discuss something? Or to read up on a topic related to intimacy? Maybe you are hearing that it’s time to let something go, or to find hobbies and interests outside of your partnership. Pay attention, because your intuition is here to help you deepen your relationships.


Listening and responding to our intuition allows us to make conscious choices that align with our authentic selves. It takes courage and asks that we trust ourselves.

Remember that your intuition wants only what is best for you. It will lead you to a deeper and more true connection with yourself, and will only guide you into greater happiness and fulfillment within your relationships.

If you would like support around this topic or anything else around cultivating healthy and thriving relationships, please contact us. We are here to support you.


Written by: Jessica Mitchell, MS, Marriage and Family Therapy/Life Coach